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Le! (Smile!)

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första tanken är inte alltid den bästa

Two Irishmen, Pat & Mike, were adrift in a lifeboat following a dramatic escape from a burning freighter. While rummaging through the boat's provisions, Pat stumbled across an old lamp. Secretly hoping that a genie would appear, he rubbed the lamp vigorously.

To the amazement of Pat, a genie came forth. This particular  genie, however, stated that he could only deliver one wish, not the standard three. Without giving much thought to the matter, Pat blurted out, "Make the entire ocean into Guinness!"

The genie lapped his hands with a deafening crash, and immediately the entire sea turned into the finest brew ever sampled by mortals. Simultaneously, the genie vanished. Only the gentle lapping of Guinness on the hull broke the stillness as the two men considered their circumstances.

Mike looked disgustedly at Pat whose wish had been granted. After a  long, tension-filled moment, he spoke:"Nice going Pat! Now we're going to have to pee in the boat."


Three men died and went to heaven. Heaven had a new policy that whatever good or bad things a person did in his or her life, he or she would get a car accordingly.

When the first man arrived, an angel asked him, "How many years were you married?" The first man responded, "Twenty years." "How many times did you cheat on your wife?" "Five times," the man said. "Okay," the angel said, "you can go in but you will only get a Fiat."

As the first man drove away in his Fiat, the second man arrived. "How many years were you married, young man?" the angel asked. "Ten years." "How many times did you cheat on your wife?" "Two times," he responded. "Well done. Here is your Volvo S40."

As the second man drove away, the third man arrived. He was a very old man. The angel asked him, "How many years were you married, old man?" "Forty years." "And how many times did you cheat on your wife?" "Never." The angel smiled and held out a set of shining keys. "Excellent, Here is your Jaguar 2000."

One day in heaven, the first and second men were driving and they came across the old man, who was crying and really depressed. They went over and asked him why he was very sad even though he had a very nice car. He told them that he just saw his wife and she was on rollerblades.


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